Hi. Hard chapter today. Please read the warnings and stay safe!
Characters: Diedre, Girtin, Betha, Silen <-found him?
Warnings!!!: Bleeding, Vomiting, Allusions to assault, Murder, Death, (mentions of child abandonment), Dissociation, Depression, PTSD depiction, Allusions to self harm (mentioned once)
Please don't read if you can't handle this. I get that I'm not the most descriptive, but please skip this chapter if that would be a problem!
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"This can't keep happening, you know." A cold, decidedly feminine voice hissed into my ear. "It's getting in the way of your job. I can't keep letting that happen." I wanted to swing out my arm at that voice. It was her wasn't it? That woman that everyone is so afraid of: Lady Death. But my arms are glued to my sides, scythe in hand. Flames in my heart roar for her blood. If only I could move.
"You." I struggle to get out that one word. A sigh escapes the woman's smug lips.
"It's funny to think of all things you could have said to me, that 'you' is all you can muster." Death mocked.
I could barely see her in the gloom of the chamber I was in. Most likely it was some sort of mental dungeon, as the last I remember, was apologizing to Girtin. Wait! Was I alone with her here? Where was Girtin?
"Come now, sister." A new voice, also feminine, more dainty than Death's called out in the darkness."She's trying her best, you know." There was a light tease to her voice, but the message seemed like it was to placate, rather than torment. Death huffed, as if to deny that train of thought.
"You are only here, again, because I am tired of seeing you break down all the time." Death scowled.
"Sister, she is trying her best." the other voice, who I was suddenly the biggest fan of, insisted again. "Bridging the gaps between lost friends takes time and effort, even you know that; we did much of the same, around the same time. Diedre is a tender child, she needs your guidance to navigate this world. Surely you understand how difficult that is for one so young?"
Suddenly I wasn't so sure of this other woman's allegiances. Sure she was Death's sister, but she at first seemed reasonable. Now? She wants to let Death help me? Is she serious?
"Madness." Death spat. "Dear Sister, we are on a time crunch. We need to have the reaper do something relating to her job. I told her before, time and time again, that we need either her friends' souls or their regrets. No more nor less. But what do I see her do? 'Reconnect' as you so tactfully put it and break down crying or passing out at every turn!-"
"You know that's not fair!" Madness shouted, the room vibrated with her pleas. "She needs her friends. She's...hurt. How else is she supposed to do her duty if she doesn't remember them?"
"Shame you didn't do that for your own children." Death retorted, making my mind frazzle with the things going over my head. I was in the middle of some argument, involving me, that suddenly became very very personal. I wished I wasn't in between two murder hornets; at least that's what I thought it was by the way judging by the anger radiating from each sister.
"You! Why you!" Madness seethed. "I tried my best. I had to leave and mourn...they were fine. He promised me. YOu have no right to say that!" She sounded like she was on the brink. I was starting to feel woozy, my head was pounding with every sentence.
"You never reconnected with your children. Look where that got them? I did what I had to do. Though, it's all in the past, isn't it dear sister?" Death continued. "But that's enough of this playtime; don't you even remember what we were here for. Think once past that guilty conscience of yours and stop projecting on Diedre!"
"Diedre" Death finally spoke directly to me. "You can't keep coming here. You need to face whatever you left behind; I can't keep covering for you. Just don't think I'm doing this to be nice. I have work to do. I'm very busy running this world, and you...needing help all the time is exhausting me. Now get out of here!"
Then I was gone, without given even an opportunity to speak for myself.
Did I imagine it, or was Death encouraging me?
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My muscles turned to soup once I mentally returned to my body. All at once, I felt Girtin's arms on me, holding me up. I heard Betha's voice, muted by clothing, Girtin's phone shoved into his armpit in his haste. I didn't look at him at he led me into a chair. Where were we? I can feel his gaze, looking me up and down for some other injury, paranoid. Where was I? I was sitting in a plush but stiff chair; it didn't seem like a hospital, even though I should probably be at one at this point. I sigh before looking around some more. It seems like I'm at a school. An empty one. A liminal space.
"Girtin. Girtin. Please tell me she's ok. I'm not going to forgive you if you let her get hurt! She's my friend too you know!!" Betha's anxious voice blared through the speaker on Girtin's phone. She must be worried.
"She's fine, Betha. She's just regained consciousness." Girtin scratched at his head while he said this, probably knowing how this would set off her, but saying it anyway.
"SHE JUST REGAINED- OH MY GOODNESS GRACIOUS MAN! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!??!" Beth screamed out the phone. "I can't leave my HOUSE and you are the ONLY one that can even HELP her. WHAT are you doing???" Girtin was rubbing his ears, holding the phone at an arms length away from him. I'd never heard Betha yell this loud before. Girtin, however, acted like this was normal, or at least pretended like it didin't bother him.
"She hasn't stopped since we left Ms.Ona's house. She just- leaves her body sometimes, walking like a zombie or something. She is fine. I am fine, thanks for asking." Girtin fumed, but kept his voice relatively steady for someone so upset.
"Oh, I knew you would be ok, but Diedre just got here a couple of days ago! I'm not trying to ignore the fact that you are doing in comparison, much much better than her. Just tell me what keeps happening, please, I'm sort of in the dark."
...
"I...get possessed by that woman. She leads my body away while my mind is elsewhere. Then, once I calm down, she lets me have control again." I sputter out, each word harder to say than the last. Girtin's eyes are widening in fear. I can hear Betha freaking out, much quieter now, she must have left the phone after she ran away from it. (That or she threw the phone.)
"Sh-she possesses you??!?" Girtin starts, utterly horrified, blood draining from his face. A face I am getting unfortunately more and more used to seeing as the days pass. "You've got to be joking! Your face, is always clear. You don't have any Darkness on you or in you. You never throw up it afterwards or anything. Betha say something! Tell her that...that there's no way that that's possible!"
"How is that possible?" A small voice is all that comes out of Betha. She's as shocked as I am at this point.
"Wait...." I tried to break them out of their horror, my face scrunched up in confusion. "What's the Darkness?"
"Ah." Both of them said at once. I could feel that this was a conversation I needed to have, but why did I feel so lost here? Betha was sputtering on her end, trying to start the, whatever this was. Girtin just looked away, looking sick. I felt like I had been a child asking how babies were made. I'm sure it wasn't like that, but it sure felt that way. Crap, I felt bad for them, asking this, but I just had to know.
"Well, Diedre...." Betha started, but not before a loud sound was heard on our end, down the hall. Girtin and I jolted our heads towards the sound, before what we saw made us made us hold our breath. A shrill cry started down the hall and at the end of it, was Silen.
Silen was gasping for air, arms twisted in pain, eyes streaming with tears. Something was not right. Purple streaks down his face, staining his clothes and skin. He was in pain, lips scrunched up into a tight line, and every so often would send out a cry. Oh no, Silen. My heart dropped seeing it, then leaping up into my throat.
"B-Betha." Silen panted, looking around, sightless. "Mommy?? Where are youuuuu??" He didn't seem right, that was obvious. He stumbled around, trying to hear for someone. Then he stopped, seemingly hearing. He faced me, purple-blue tinged teary eyes staring right at me. "Diedre....it's you!" He said out of breath, not before heaving, bent over with his hands on his knees. He looked like he was going to be sick. He did. Purple bile pooling out of him, sickening me; I had to close my eyes before I was sick myself.
"Betha..." Girtin whispered to the phone, taking it off speaker. "We found Silen....and it's not good. He's been taken over by the Darkness." I can hear Betha's shock and grief, even from the distance I stood from them. Then I hear Silen 'walking' over to us. It was sickening; his heaving chest, crying face, but blank expression, his body stumbling over to Girtin and I. He looked like a zombie. I grab Girtin's arm, shaking it.
"Betha it's bad. He's got it bad. We have to get out of here!" I can hear her protesting. You can't leave him there, she was saying. He needs you, she told Girtin. "He could start corrupting! Do you want Diedre - you know- we have to go- what if we got me- Diedre can't hold back the both of us!!!" Girtin screamed at the phone, utterly distraught. Silen's head turned towards Girtin.
"Girtin?? You came back! <3" His tears stopped only for a second before he started to cough. "You didn't leave me! I'm so glad. I'm so glad I have you as a friend. Now we just have to find Betha and Mommy; we'll be friends again and you all can live with me. Hahaha. I'm so glad we are together again. I was so so so so lonely without everyone. I couldn't. I couldn't bear to be alone. But it's okay now. It's okay now. AHhhhaaaa." Silen's speech was interrupted by a fresh tears. They were never ending. Tears prickled at the edges of mine.
My heart broke for him. We had to help him, but how? The sycthe! I had no idea how to sever any regrets, but I had to try. I couldn't let him hurt himself anymore. I couldn't bear seeing his face covered in tears. I lift the blade out in front of me, out at an arms length, stomach level. Girtin's shocked face in the corner of my vision broke my focus.
"NO! Diedre, he can be saved, you don't have to do that!" Girtin screamed, trying to push the weapon out of my hands before getting the shock of a lifetime, it pushing him back to the floor. I look back at him to see if he was ok. He looked alright, but looked like he wanted to bail, fear however, rooted him to the spot.
-Talk to him-
-Find the source-
-If not, I can not guarantee this will end well-
"Silen." I start, not sure where to begin.
"Diedre, my friend." Silen slurred." You came back for me. I'm so happy." Silen's eyes went back into his head when he said this, tears stopped for now, utterly lost. He was still stumbling towards us taking little breaks here and there. Now, he had a voice to walk to. Fear was rising from the pit that was my stomach, but I had to push it down. I had to be brave for Silen.
"Silen, yes I'm back. I came back for you." I try to keep my voice even, to sound comforting.
"Happy :)"
"I'm sorry I left. I'm back now." I had no idea what to say to him.
"You left me alone. Everyone left me alone!" Silen's gentle voice raised in decible, reaching a scream. "You all left me with...that...and I...it hurt so much. That's horrible. It's so bad. I don't even feel like myself anymore. If I could make it go away...I would. Diedre help me!!!!" He screamed, voice louder than he'd ever been when we were kids.
"I didn't know. I'm sorry. We can make it better-"
"NOOOO!!!" Silen cried," Everyone gave up. You gave up. I hated it, everything that was happening to me. It hurttttt. I want to cut it out! Cut it out! Cut it." He was inconsolable now, hyperventilating. His weak body began to run, at my voice, at such a speed I didn't know was even possible for him right now.
No. I can't do this. I can't hurt him. I just need to stop him. How? How can I do that? Not with the blade, but with the handle? Do I even need it? Just like I did with Girtin. I have to do something!
"Girtin get away!!" I yell at the shocked boy beside me, not daring to look at him in the face. I drop the scythe, it made a loud clatter on the laminate floor. I could finally see the miasma that Betha was talking about. It was thick and heavy, coming from its human source, spreading out into the hallway. I could hear Girtin cursing my name as he ran away to escape its reach. I didn't look at him; All I could do was open my arms at the charging teenager, blinded by grief.
Something happened when we collided.
I don't remember pain.
It was nothing.
It was everything at once.
Our minds were one.
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Let's all take a week off from that. OMG. Please watch some cat vids or whatever you use to normally decompress; I know I need that right now.
I'll see you all next week...or not. That's cool too. :))))
Good night.
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---Chapter Navigation--
Chapter 9 (Linky) - Chapter 10 (you are here) --> Chapter 11 (Linky)
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