{Forget Already} Promise me [Main Fiction] (Chapter 14)

Hi! Sorry it's been taking so long on updates. I've been having a lot of issues with writing anything lately, and hit a road block. I have a roadmap of where I want the story to go, but it's the little details. Ahhhh. It's really annoying sometimes.

This is really a between type chapter, wrapping up the events that took place in the first part. I'll try to start the next bit sooner rather than later. Fingers crossed. :)))

Warning: processing stuff

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It didn't make sense to go anywhere else after that. We had to go back to Betha's house. Well it's not like she could go anywhere else with us. Betha can't leave the forest for some reason. She's told me time and time again, but won't elaborate on why. I can't help but think that the time for that is going to be coming soon. I need to ask her. If it's a curse or something I can break it surely. Is that even a thing here? It really doesn't matter. Sure I won't know how, but it'll be better if I can a least try to help. This stupid scythe has to be good for something. What's the point to this stupid thing after all? Feeling it's weight in the back of my mind, I start to doubt myself.

What's the point of me being here anyway? I keep getting my ass kicked every time something/someone tries to attack me or someone I care about. My pride can only take so much. I can only take so much. I'm starting to seriously wonder why I was even chosen for this stupid task...thing. It's starting to become very obvious to me that Death has a few screws loose; I guess I do too since I'm still here. It's not like I have another way out of here.

At least there's nothing broken this time. My friends are still trying to be cautious and we are taking it slowly; going slowly back to Betha's house and the destruction that Ether did to it. I can see the door still on the ground in the clearing beyond the trees. By the way that Betha stiffens up, so does she. Regardless of how she views the place: a jail or home, it still sucks to be reminded of the last couple of hours.

"Well." Betha finally whispers, sighing loudly through her nose. I can feel her deflate. I grip her arm, trying to remind her that I'm here for her.

"Right, let's just go in. I'll find a curtain or something." Girtin urges lightly. His determined expression calms me down a little. At least he hasn't given up, right? He leads us to the doorway, not looking at the door on the ground as we pass it. Betha doesn't either.

Once we enter the threshold of the building I take in the extent of the damage. It wasn't that bad, all things considered. Betha was lucky; a couple of overturned chairs and broken cups was better than- I don't even want to think. It's hard not to allow myself to imagine what it could've been like. I shake myself lightly. I can't just think about that. 

I am led to the couch, a ratty purple thing that looked older than sin. I didn't sink too far into it. Which was a good thing being as sore as I was. I must have overestimated my injures earlier, but that didn't mean I wasn't tender. My throat hurt the most. I could still feel Ether's cold slender hands on my neck. I shudder to myself. Girtin's head bobbed up, alert.

"We're working on the heating situation, hang tight. Do you need a blanket? Let me get you one." Girtin walks off without me even speaking. I huff but say nothing. Betha shakes me suddenly, urgently.

"Let me get you some clothes to wear. They aren't damp anymore, but you look like you could use a clean set. I'm sure I have some things that would suit you. I might have some jeans, but I'm not sure if they'd fit." She hums to herself, thoughtful. "Unless you would like a skirt?" Her eyebrows dart up at that.

"Ahhh, no." I declare, crossing my arms in a big 'x'. "I'll pass on the skirt. I had enough of that growing up. Mom just went crazy for dresses, you know that. No, thank you!" Betha just giggles at that, apologizing to me but not sorry at all.

"I know, Diedre. I'm just teasing you. Come on! Let me help you up. We'll go in my room so you can have some privacy." She leads the way to a small room that branches down a hallway from the living room.

-

The moment we crossed the doorway of the room I could feel that the air had changed. Colder. More solemn. Betha just walks to the window and grabs something in a small dresser.

"Diedre, thank you for listening to my request and keeping Silen safe." Betha smiled solemnly. "I don't think I could ever be as brave as you. Actually, I'm just scared. I'm scared of going back home and seeing what it looks like now. I know I'm not alive anymore, but I'm just so scared."

"Diedre I've been lying to you all this time. Well, maybe not, but I just want you to understand." I nod my head to that.

"No one is stopping me from leaving the forest. It's just the fear, it's me. That's what's it's always been..." Betha trails off, getting quiet, she slowly sits on the bed. Her hands grip each other on her lap, like she's fighting with herself. Then she suddenly faces me, eyes wide with shock. "Oh, no- no I'm sorry I forgot to give you the clothes. You-you got hurt. I let you get hurt. I couldn't do anything." Betha stares blankly at her hands, seemingly unable to cry. She sniffles a little. "No. There isn't anything I can do now. I'm sorry."

"What are you sorry about Betha?" I ask her, frowning a little. "You had no idea that Death would do that. Ya sure you being in one place made you 'easier' to track, but I bet even if you were at your old house, it would be the same as if Silen or Girtin was taken. I mean, I'd still come to save you; you are my friend after all."

"Look if you don't want to go to the city, you don't have to. If being out here makes you feel safe, then that's fine. I'll still visit." She nods slowly, handing me a bundle of clothes. I turn around and face the opposite wall, feeling nervous.

"I know what you're saying, Diedre. I don't want you to get the wrong idea about what I'm saying. I have to go, and what I'm asking you is for you to come with me. Well, you and Girtin, but you get what I'm saying." She hesitates, twiddling her fingers. "I'm leaving this place. I can't take living alone anymore."

I nod, finally turning around to face Betha. She smiles at me, tension releasing from the shoulders. I feel something being handing to me: a small vial of some unknown ruby colored liquid.

"This is kind of cheating, but I have this. It's a healing thing. You know, like in video games." She sheepishly hands it to me. "I don't have much, but this should do for your wounds and pain. It tastes horrible, so be ready."

I'm not a stranger to downing cough syrup or whatever weird concoction my mom put me up to, back when she was trying to save money. I just knock it back. Betha carefully watches my reaction, her unsettled expression not fading until I finish the vial. I shrug lazily. It doesn't taste bad, per se, but it is extremely herbal. It tastes a bit like dirt. I've had much worse. At least it doesn't have alcohol in it.

"So how do you feel?" Betha smiles, face relaxing, and she sits on the bed, folding her hands over her lap. How do I feel? My neck doesn't hurt and I can move it without any pain. It doesn't hurt to breathe. I just nod, giving Betha a small smile for her efforts. "I don't want to sound selfish, but I wanted to make sure you were well enough for the journey tomorrow. I need to go as soon as possible."

"Oh, yea, I get it. Betha. Look. It's ok." I smile down at her. "I was wondering about getting there, but hey, I don't hurt anymore. I can make the trip!" Betha laughs halfheartedly at my attempt at bravado. I'll take what I can get.

Not so distantly I can hear Girtin run down the hallway to the door, hurriedly knocking.

"Hey, Betha, you know you have like no food right? What is Diedre going to eat? All you have is the purple stuff! Not even-" Betha just gets up, straightens out her face, and stomps to the door; she yoinks it open, much to Girtin's surprise. (I guess he figured I was changing, as his face was red for like two seconds...)

"I'll have you know that the 'purple stuff' is extremely nutritious and completely edible! We've been through this Girtin!" Betha huffs. "Besides, it can 'look' like food, you just need to be creative!" All he does is sigh to that, rolling his eyes. He jams his hands in his pockets.

"I guess I'm starving tonight. Good night, ladies, I'm getting an early start." And with that, he leaves to the guest room (I'm assuming), and closes the door before Betha can grab him.

We just look at each other. Betha grumbling to herself; sounding a lot like 'why is he like this?'.

"I'll give it a try, but no promises Betha. If it's gross I'm spitting it out." I say over my shoulder, walking over to the kitchen I saw earlier from the couch.

-

I lay on the couch, exausted after Betha's worried insisting that she or Girtin (her obvious pick) take the couch. I had to keep telling her that it was fine. It wouldn't seem right that I take her bed or that we wake Girtin up. It's just one night. It took time, but she finally caved after I took three blankets from her (to make it more comfortable, she said). Sighing and finally relaxing into the covers I try to think about nothing, emptying my mind. Staring at the ceiling, I count sheep; it's never helped much, but at this point I'd try anything. Relax. Relax. I have to sleep before-

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I'm somewhere warm, comforting, and familiar.

-

I'm sideways, on a pillow on someone's lap. A hand in gently stroking my hair, smoothing the cowlicks and untangling the knots. Groggily I stir a little, trying to get a look at the person. The hand stops.

-Ah, I woke you up. Sorry, sweetheart.-

The voice is male. I don't remember who this is. Maybe it's another something I've forgotten. Another memory I've locked away. Shame leaks into my heart.

-Was it a bad dream?-

The voice is like honey in my ears. It washes away the bitterness. I'm lulled into a childish mindset, one that promises that everything is going to be ok. I let it for once.

-I have bad dreams too. It might help if you talk about it. Once you talk about it, you can see how small your worries are.-

I can't talk. I can't ask the questions I want. A small childish voice comes from my mouth instead. A story about mommy, daddy, and XXXXXX leaving me behind. A childish fear, but it happened anyway, I think bitterly.

-I couldn't sleep. I couldn't stop thinking about the same thing.-

-You and I are so alike sweetheart. I'm sorry. I wish it could be different.-

-But. I will try my best not to ever have to leave you or your mother or your XXXXXX. Life has a way of bending your will to fit fate's design. I might have to go away, but you and I will always be apart of each other.-

-No matter what happens: I will always love you, sweetheart. Daddy will always love you. Mommy will always love you. Nothing you do will change that.-

A childish voice, once that I finally realize is mine, declares that she'll always protect her Daddy and that she'll never leave him. She nuzzles into him, turning up to see just enough of the fiery red hair, pushed messily over his face. His faltering smile is all I can see at first, but she doesn't see that. She doesn't see the tears streaking down his face, lips quivering, and deep shadows under his eyes. All she sees is the father who's always been there for her. Finally she notices, when some tears hit her face, and she asks what's wrong.

-Promise me that you'll protect them. Your family needs you, just like you need them.-

Why do you act like you know you are going away? Why do you know? Why does this feel like you're saying good bye? But the little girl doesn't know the future, she only knows what's important now, so she wholeheartedly promises.

-Your mother and I love you so much, Diedre.-

The pit in my heart grows, no longer soothed by the presence of a father I can barely remember. I know now why I didn't want to remember this one. What happens after this? I don't remember.-

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I shudder awake with a phantom kiss on my forehead. My blankets are on the floor. Both Girtin and Betha are chatting over some food. They quickly eat what they are holding and look at me worried.

"We were just about to wake you up, but Betha said no." Girtin laughs smugly, poking his finger at her.

"It's not even that far into the morning, we have a three hour walk. It's 'fine' Girtin." Betha mocks him.

"What were you eating? I thought Betha's food was purple." I ask. Girtin clams up, mouth pressed into a worried frown.

"Ha-ah it was hiding. I had no idea, but she had a secret stash of....-" Girtin spudders wildly.

"-Poptarts." Betha interjects," Sorry these were the last ones. Besides don't you hate smores? Or did you gain some good taste?" She laughs at her joke, briefly, before flashing her most innocent expressions at me.

"Drugged poptarts?" I smirk. Betha's scandalized expression is almost worth it. All Girtin does is laugh wildly at her expression, holding his stomach. He chokes a little before stopping.

"NO!" Betha shrieks,"Maybe it would be best for you to start getting ready to walk, we have a long way to go!!" She hurriedly grabs me and gets me ready, against my will. Feeling more like a doll than a person, I let myself wonder about that.

Huh. Poptarts don't glow. Maybe they were eating bugs?

-

The hours pass slowly as we walk together. The weather is pleasant, but I'm still on edge after meeting Ether. Maybe I let myself pretend I was relaxing when I was at Betha's old house, but they're always at the back of my mind. Those creepy soulless eyes, pushing me further and further into the water. I shake myself, trying to focus on walking, trying to avoid panic. Let's try not to do that today, I bitterly tell myself. Girtin notices me and purposely bumps into me.

"Hey dumbass, what'cha thinking about? Better not be Betha's sorry cooking. She'd murder me if she heard that." Girtin whispered. "Come on, Diedre, you're obvi really hung up about something. Is it the drugged poptarts? If I find anymore-"

"It's about Ether. I can't get him out of my head." I confess. Girtin clams up, good humor gone.

"He's gone now, Diedre." Was all that Giritin told me before he lost his nerve. He grabs my hand.

"I know, but I can't just keep getting beat up. I just barely kicked Silen's dad's ass and now Death's lacky comes up." I fret, looking more at the ground than him.

"Wait you kicked....Silen's dad's ass?" Girtin stopped me, grimacing. "Dang I wanted to do it. Freak got what he got. Glad you did it, though." Gripping my hand in a quick squeeze, he starts walking again, leaving me in the dust. Huffing, I follow after him.

-

I tried not to think about hands around my throat for the rest of the walk. Tried, but failed. What can you do? I just stew about it for who knows how long. One foot after another. I keep walking. We pass the sign to the orphanage. We walk, the other two chatting about the weather, and I remain behind, watching the clouds. I watch for blades of dead eyed butlers and the sludge of miasma, in the form of our devils and demons, waiting for the chance to silence us. 

Once we make it to the edge of the city, entering the rows and rows of suburban houses that mark the boundary to Silen's house. Betha has a death grip on my arm, eyes fixed firmly on the ground. She's walking on the sidewalk as far as humanly possible to the road. I notice that she's starting to shake and take longer breaths, like she's trying to calm herself down. I squeeze her arm. Girtin leads the way, walking Betha through the neighborhood, talking to her. There are no cars. There are no people. The city is quiet and it always will. But to Betha, she must see something else, so she looks at the ground.

I didn't notice that her eyes were dripping, but instead of telling Girtin, I just held her.

"I'm sorry." She whispered.

 

-I'm a burden.-

 

"It's alright; we're almost there." I urge her down the sidewalk, distracting her throughout the crosswalks, where she seemed more stressed.

 

-I only make things worse.-

-I shouldn't have done this.-

-I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have come back but she made me.-

-I'm scared. I can't have it happen again.-

-What if it comes back?-

 

Girtin stops in his tracks. I look up in bewilderment, pulling the smaller girl towards me. It's the house: it's back to normal! Well, where it was before, but the same as I saw before. I barely notice the small carrot headed boy sitting on the steps at first. A gasp can be heard. Silen's face darts up to look at us, eyes sparkling at the sight of Betha. With a scream he runs down to her, giggling, almost tripping over the bottom step.

Betha whips the streaks off her face, shocked into not moving. Her legs not holding up, the rest of her sliding down my leg, causing the rest of us to panic. Silen doesn't stop or slow down, collapsing into the shorter girl, and me by extension, gripping her into a bear hug. His face is hidden in her neck, rubbing his face into it.

"Betha. Betha. Betha." His voice, crackling with adoration, repeats over and over. All she can do is let her arms rest at her sides, as he smothers her. She smiles at him, fear leaving her eyes, and then she closes them.

I can feel something in the void that I keep my scythe in, a buzzing warmth trying to get my attention. I step back, Girtin watching me a moment before turning to the other two, and pull out the tool. The handle has another light: a ball.

Oh. A ball. That's what caused the accident.

"Silen give her some breathing space, geez." Girtin laughs, breaking me out of my trance. I quickly hide my scythe back into the void, my heart feeling fuller. The commotion is loud enough that Ms. Ona comes out, with her walking stick in hand she, as quickly as she can, comes over. She joins them on the ground and holds Betha along with her son.

"Welcome home sweetheart." Ms. Ona, whispers.

"It's so good to be back." Betha cries. Clutching the two even tighter.

Girtin and I watch the scene, smiling at each other. Eventually our eyes locked and Girtin shrugged, grabbing my hand pulling me into the group hug.

Warmth. Surrounded by the people I didn't realize I missed. It only dawned on me now that I was finally home. Everyone was happy. Everyone was safe.

Even if this was fake. It wasn't real because everyone here, besides myself, is dead. Tears begin to prickle my eyes realizing this. Once I get out of here, everything will return back to normal. I will be left alone. Bitterness clutches my heart. When did I get so sentimental over this? When did I become so clingy to the past? I wish I was past this. I pull away.

Betha grabs my wrist. Her eyes are filled with understanding and she smiles. Everyone else breaks their hug to look at me. Silen's tear streaked face smiling. Girtin with his proud gaze, arms crossed. Ms. Ona, her sightless eyes full of hope.

"We know you have to go." Betha whispers. "You have so much to do. You have to get out of here. You have to live."

"Ya, something about the gate to the world of the living closing soon." Girtin nodded, grimacing.

"We'll be fine here." Silen smiled. Ms. Ona nodded in agreement.

"What are you talking about? I can't just leave yet." I argue halfheartedly. I don't want to leave yet. Betha just puts her hands on my shoulders, locking eyes with me.

"Please, Diedre. You have to hurry. We will always be with you. Once you do what you have to do, you can return home, and we will come with you. If not in the flesh, but in your memories."

"Besides you have our numbers, for as long as you are in this world." Girtin points out.

"Or you could call me with a seance! Use a spirit board! It's fun and I'll always answer!" Silen bubbly laughed. "It's not 'goodbye' it's 'see you later!'" I smiled in spite of myself at that.

"Just, Diedre, promise me you'll take care of yourself!" Betha pleaded. "It's not weak to ask for help. Promise me."

-Promise me-

-It's not goodbye-

-I'd like to see you again-

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I'll leave that there for now!

I might come back and make Betha's part in the city a bit longer. I just kind of ran out of steam there. I bet that's obvious. :)))))

 Also there were no drugged poptarts, Girtin's just lying. :)))) 

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Chapter 13 (Linky) - Chapter 14 (you are here) --> Chapter 15 (Linky)

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{Forget Already} Title Unknown [Main Fiction] (Chapter 10)

 Hi. Hard chapter today. Please read the warnings and stay safe!

Characters: Diedre, Girtin, Betha, Silen <-found him?

 Warnings!!!: Bleeding, Vomiting, Allusions to assault, Murder, Death, (mentions of child abandonment), Dissociation, Depression, PTSD depiction, Allusions to self harm (mentioned once)

Please don't read if you can't handle this. I get that I'm not the most descriptive, but please skip this chapter if that would be a problem!

 

 

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 "This can't keep happening, you know." A cold, decidedly feminine voice hissed into my ear. "It's getting in the way of your job. I can't keep letting that happen." I wanted to swing out my arm at that voice. It was her wasn't it? That woman that everyone is so afraid of: Lady Death. But my arms are glued to my sides, scythe in hand. Flames in my heart roar for her blood. If only I could move. 

"You." I struggle to get out that one word. A sigh escapes the woman's smug lips.

"It's funny to think of all things you could have said to me, that 'you' is all you can muster." Death mocked.

I could barely see her in the gloom of the chamber I was in.  Most likely it was some sort of mental dungeon, as the last I remember, was apologizing to Girtin. Wait! Was I alone with her here? Where was Girtin?

"Come now, sister." A new voice, also feminine, more dainty than Death's called out in the darkness."She's trying her best, you know." There was a light tease to her voice, but the message seemed like it was to placate, rather than torment. Death huffed, as if to deny that train of thought.

"You are only here, again, because I am tired of seeing you break down all the time." Death scowled.

"Sister, she is trying her best." the other voice, who I was suddenly the biggest fan of, insisted again. "Bridging the gaps between lost friends takes time and effort, even you know that; we did much of the same, around the same time. Diedre is a tender child, she needs your guidance to navigate this world. Surely you understand how difficult that is for one so young?" 

Suddenly I wasn't so sure of this other woman's allegiances. Sure she was Death's sister, but she at first seemed reasonable. Now? She wants to let Death help me? Is she serious?

"Madness." Death spat. "Dear Sister, we are on a time crunch. We need to have the reaper do something relating to her job. I told her before, time and time again, that we need either her friends' souls or their regrets. No more nor less. But what do I see her do? 'Reconnect' as you so tactfully put it and break down crying or passing out at every turn!-"

"You know that's not fair!" Madness shouted, the room vibrated with her pleas. "She needs her friends. She's...hurt. How else is she supposed to do her duty if she doesn't remember them?"

"Shame you didn't do that for your own children." Death retorted, making my mind frazzle with the things going over my head. I was in the middle of some argument, involving me, that suddenly became very very personal. I wished I wasn't in between two murder hornets; at least that's what I thought it was by the way judging by the anger radiating from each sister.

"You! Why you!" Madness seethed. "I tried my best. I had to leave and mourn...they were fine. He promised me. YOu have no right to say that!" She sounded like she was on the brink. I was starting to feel woozy, my head was pounding with every sentence.

"You never reconnected with your children. Look where that got them? I did what I had to do. Though, it's all in the past, isn't it dear sister?" Death continued. "But that's enough of this playtime; don't you even remember what we were here for. Think once past that guilty conscience of yours and stop projecting on Diedre!"

"Diedre" Death finally spoke directly to me. "You can't keep coming here. You need to face whatever you left behind; I can't keep covering for you. Just don't think I'm doing this to be nice. I have work to do. I'm very busy running this world, and you...needing help all the time is exhausting me. Now get out of here!"

Then I was gone, without given even an opportunity to speak for myself.

Did I imagine it, or was Death encouraging me?

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My muscles turned to soup once I mentally returned to my body. All at once, I felt Girtin's arms on me, holding me up. I heard Betha's voice, muted by clothing, Girtin's phone shoved into his armpit in his haste. I didn't look at him at he led me into a chair. Where were we? I can feel his gaze, looking me up and down for some other injury, paranoid. Where was I? I was sitting in a plush but stiff chair; it didn't seem like a hospital, even though I should probably be at one at this point. I sigh before looking around some more. It seems like I'm at a school. An empty one. A liminal space.

"Girtin. Girtin. Please tell me she's ok. I'm not going to forgive you if you let her get hurt! She's my friend too you know!!" Betha's anxious voice blared through the speaker on Girtin's phone. She must be worried. 

"She's fine, Betha. She's just regained consciousness." Girtin scratched at his head while he said this, probably knowing how this would set off her, but saying it anyway.

"SHE JUST REGAINED- OH MY GOODNESS GRACIOUS MAN! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!??!" Beth screamed out the phone. "I can't leave my HOUSE and you are the ONLY one that can even HELP her. WHAT are you doing???" Girtin was rubbing his ears, holding the phone at an arms length away from him. I'd never heard Betha yell this loud before. Girtin, however, acted like this was normal, or at least pretended like it didin't bother him.

"She hasn't stopped since we left Ms.Ona's house. She just- leaves her body sometimes, walking like a zombie or something. She is fine. I am fine, thanks for asking." Girtin fumed, but kept his voice relatively steady for someone so upset.

"Oh, I knew you would be ok, but Diedre just got here a couple of days ago! I'm not trying to ignore the fact that you are doing in comparison, much much better than her. Just tell me what keeps happening, please, I'm sort of in the dark."

...

"I...get possessed by that woman. She leads my body away while my mind is elsewhere. Then, once I calm down, she lets me have control again." I sputter out, each word harder to say than the last. Girtin's eyes are widening in fear. I can hear Betha freaking out, much quieter now, she must have left the phone after she ran away from it. (That or she threw the phone.)

"Sh-she possesses you??!?" Girtin starts, utterly horrified, blood draining from his face. A face I am getting unfortunately more and more used to seeing as the days pass. "You've got to be joking! Your face, is always clear. You don't have any Darkness on you or in you. You never throw up it afterwards or anything. Betha say something! Tell her that...that there's no way that that's possible!"

"How is that possible?" A small voice is all that comes out of Betha. She's as shocked as I am at this point.

"Wait...." I tried to break them out of their horror, my face scrunched up in confusion. "What's the Darkness?"

"Ah." Both of them said at once. I could feel that this was a conversation I needed to have, but why did I feel so lost here? Betha was sputtering on her end, trying to start the, whatever this was. Girtin just looked away, looking sick. I felt like I had been a child asking how babies were made. I'm sure it wasn't like that, but it sure felt that way. Crap, I felt bad for them, asking this, but I just had to know.

"Well, Diedre...." Betha started, but not before a loud sound was heard on our end, down the hall. Girtin and I jolted our heads towards the sound, before what we saw made us made us hold our breath. A shrill cry started down the hall and at the end of it, was Silen.

Silen was gasping for air, arms twisted in pain, eyes streaming with tears. Something was not right. Purple streaks down his face, staining his clothes and skin. He was in pain, lips scrunched up into a tight line, and every so often would send out a cry. Oh no, Silen. My heart dropped seeing it, then leaping up into my throat.

"B-Betha." Silen panted, looking around, sightless. "Mommy?? Where are youuuuu??" He didn't seem right, that was obvious. He stumbled around, trying to hear for someone. Then he stopped, seemingly hearing. He faced me, purple-blue tinged teary eyes staring right at me. "Diedre....it's you!" He said out of breath, not before heaving, bent over with his hands on his knees. He looked like he was going to be sick. He did. Purple bile pooling out of him, sickening me; I had to close my eyes before I was sick myself.

"Betha..." Girtin whispered to the phone, taking it off speaker. "We found Silen....and it's not good. He's been taken over by the Darkness." I can hear Betha's shock and grief, even from the distance I stood from them. Then I hear Silen 'walking' over to us. It was sickening; his heaving chest, crying face, but blank expression, his body stumbling over to Girtin and I. He looked like a zombie. I grab Girtin's arm, shaking it.

"Betha it's bad. He's got it bad. We have to get out of here!" I can hear her protesting. You can't leave him there, she was saying. He needs you, she told Girtin. "He could start corrupting! Do you want Diedre - you know- we have to go- what if we got me- Diedre can't hold back the both of us!!!" Girtin screamed at the phone, utterly distraught. Silen's head turned towards Girtin.

"Girtin?? You came back! <3" His tears stopped only for a second before he started to cough. "You didn't leave me! I'm so glad. I'm so glad I have you as a friend. Now we just have to find Betha and Mommy; we'll be friends again and you all can live with me. Hahaha. I'm so glad we are together again. I was so so so so lonely without everyone. I couldn't. I couldn't bear to be alone. But it's okay now. It's okay now. AHhhhaaaa." Silen's speech was interrupted by a fresh tears. They were never ending. Tears prickled at the edges of mine.

My heart broke for him. We had to help him, but how? The sycthe! I had no idea how to sever any regrets, but I had to try. I couldn't let him hurt himself anymore. I couldn't bear seeing his face covered in tears. I lift the blade out in front of me, out at an arms length, stomach level. Girtin's shocked face in the corner of my vision broke my focus.

"NO! Diedre, he can be saved, you don't have to do that!" Girtin screamed, trying to push the weapon out of my hands before getting the shock of a lifetime, it pushing him back to the floor. I look back at him to see if he was ok. He looked alright, but looked like he wanted to bail, fear however, rooted him to the spot.

 

-Talk to him-

-Find the source-

-If not, I can not guarantee this will end well-

"Silen." I start, not sure where to begin.

"Diedre, my friend." Silen slurred." You came back for me. I'm so happy." Silen's eyes went back into his head when he said this, tears stopped for now, utterly lost. He was still stumbling towards us taking little breaks here and there. Now, he had a voice to walk to. Fear was rising from the pit that was my stomach, but I had to push it down. I had to be brave for Silen.

"Silen, yes I'm back. I came back for you." I try to keep my voice even, to sound comforting.

"Happy :)"

"I'm sorry I left. I'm back now." I had no idea what to say to him.

"You left me alone. Everyone left me alone!" Silen's gentle voice raised in decible, reaching a scream. "You all left me with...that...and I...it hurt so much. That's horrible. It's so bad. I don't even feel like myself anymore. If I could make it go away...I would. Diedre help me!!!!" He screamed, voice louder than he'd ever been when we were kids.

"I didn't know. I'm sorry. We can make it better-"

"NOOOO!!!" Silen cried," Everyone gave up. You gave up. I hated it, everything that was happening to me. It hurttttt. I want to cut it out! Cut it out! Cut it." He was inconsolable now, hyperventilating. His weak body began to run, at my voice, at such a speed I didn't know was even possible for him right now.

No. I can't do this. I can't hurt him. I just need to stop him. How? How can I do that? Not with the blade, but with the handle? Do I even need it? Just like I did with Girtin. I have to do something!

"Girtin get away!!" I yell at the shocked boy beside me, not daring to look at him in the face. I drop the scythe, it made a loud clatter on the laminate floor. I could finally see the miasma that Betha was talking about. It was thick and heavy, coming from its human source, spreading out into the hallway. I could hear Girtin cursing my name as he ran away to escape its reach. I didn't look at him; All I could do was open my arms at the charging teenager, blinded by grief. 

Something happened when we collided.

I don't remember pain.

It was nothing.

It was everything at once.

Our minds were one.

-

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Let's all take a week off from that. OMG. Please watch some cat vids or whatever you use to normally decompress; I know I need that right now.

I'll see you all next week...or not. That's cool too. :))))

Good night.

-

 

---Chapter Navigation--

Chapter 9 (Linky) - Chapter 10  (you are here) --> Chapter 11 (Linky)

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 Thank you all for the support!

{Forget Already} I'm sorry [Main Fiction] (Chapter 9)

 I just want to say back up your work. I have no idea what happened and I'm still reeling over the loss of the work. OMG. I want to throw something!!!! ;.;

Back up your work! PLEASE. 

Thanks for coming to my TedTalk. ;.;

 

Characters: Diedre and Girtin

Warnings: PLEASE READ THEM. SKIP THIS CHAPTER IF YOU HAVE TO!!!!!!

Dissociation, Dissociative Amnesia, Mentions of Murder/Child Abuse (can be missed), Depression, Suicide (not descriptive)

WE are looking for Silen. Is that what we are going to find?

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When I came to, I was walking. Why was I walking? I can't remember. The last thing I remember was being on the floor, two worried faces staring back at me. Then nothing. I don't remember how I got here. That's about normal now, isn't it? I can't help but feel helpless in this situation.

"Diedre!" A shout at my ear tore me out of my daze. I don't remember stopping. Turning to the sound, I numbly noticed Girtin's worried face. He noticed my gaze, huffing slightly before turning away. He must have been worried. He crosses his arms. "You. Just. Can't. DO. THAT! What the heck happened?!" His eyes swept up and down my body, looking for an injury. The grip on his arms is turning his knuckles white. He eyed the scythe for the longest time almost glued to my hand, held in a death grip, before covering his eyes, groaning.

"Girtin...I." I settle on his wide eyed glare full of concern, trying to think of how to calm him down. "I'm ok, I think. I don't remember...anything right now."

"You think you're ok?? Oh, that's great. Had me worked up over nothing!" His voice dripping with sarcasm. "No really, that's awesome. Ms. Ona was going to call the hospital, but then UP you go! Out the door and down the road, mumbling up a storm, scythe in hand. You looked...wrong."

"I'm fine Girtin."

"We thought you died, Diedre." Girtin stopped me, holding my arms at my sides, our height difference even more apparent. 

I just looked at the friend that had become a stranger. How could I tell him that? It was horrible to even think about. Though that ship has sailed, hasn't it? I just had to keep going and hopefully get to that bridge later.

"I got better." I deadpan. Girtin's hollow expression shows no laughter, only pain. Oh. It was that bad huh? I was wrong again.

"What happened to you back there, Diedre? Not just in the house, but...where are you in the real world? What changed?" Girtin bit his lip before continuing," You are so different. You'd never endanger yourself like that! I can't keep up. I mean, you left everyone behind here; I was the only one left."

"I never thought I'd see you again, Diedre, you know that? I was completely ok with never seeing your face again. You came back with that dang scythe looking like some weirdo in a story book, acting like you didn't even know us!"

"I'm sorry-"

"Even Betha thinks it's weird! Oh, yes, I've talked with her! SHE'S sooooo worried about you. After all, you are her BEST friend! She said you didn't remember her at first and even forgot she died. DIED. How am I supposed to believe you even remember me?" Girtin screamed at me, tearing at his hair. 

Then, as quickly as his anger started, it cooled into regret. I could see his body curl into itself. He took more than a couple of deep breaths. He didn't look at me. It was shocking to say this least, but not that surprising. He was right: I did leave him behind. I didn't do it on purpose, I was so young when my mother left the city with me in tow, but I did it all the same. I never wrote. I never called. I never even visited. I wish I could just blame my mother on all of this, but I couldn't, not in good faith. I'm an adult now; I live on my own and pay my own bills. I can't blame my mother for something I could've done myself. Even with all the blood I've seen. With all the friends my young eyes had seen buried.

"It's not like it's your fault. I could never really blame you. " A quieter Girtin whispered to me, breaking the silence that had grown between us. "Betha, Silen, his mom....they never chose this. They hate it here. They don't deserve to be here. I do. I-I can't do this." Girtin broke down, trying to do the deep breathing again, just failing only just enough to keep the tears falling.

Something cold settled into my stomach. It felt like understanding. Girtin. I reached for him, his whimpering form, so unused to reacting to pain this way, sat on the floor crumbling. I held him in my arms, his head nestled in my chest. My eyes closed.

"I didn't want to hurt you anymore. I didn't want to hurt anyone, but I did. I left, Girtin, but I'm back now." It was never going to be enough. I just hope what I just said didn't cause him more pain.

"Diedre....I did something unforgivable." Girtin's voice was hard to hear, it was gravelly, more quiet than he had been for the past hour. I'd have to get him some water later.

"You don't have to tell me if you're not ready. We have a lot of time." I try to say in the most soothing voice. 

"I have to tell you. I don't know how you'd react; I'd thought about it a lot since I'd seen you. I mean, I tried to keep it as normal as I could between us; like it used to be. That's kind of impossible now isn't it?"

"You can tell me anything. Just take your time. Don't force yourself, Girtin." I rub his back in little circles in a way that I hoped was soothing. How could I know that it was working?

-

Girtin took a deep breath, "I guess I should start at the top, Diedre, since you missed out on it. Well, after you left, they found Silen. H-he was in bad shape, it was horrible. There was no way to save him or that other thing they found with him. It's never getting out. Never...but that's it. Please don't ask me about that. I don't want to talk about it." Girtin gripped me tighter.

"Then, Ms. Ona left town. I helped her move; it was so hard, we kept crying, trying to comfort each other. I was the only one who left to help her. Then it was just me. My uncle started flat out ignoring me. I couldn't take it, so I ran away." I didn't say anything. I just let him vent. It was horrible so think about it, but he kept talking.

"I just wanted to get away from everything. I had some bad thoughts about stuff. It just kept getting worse. I just wanted to make it stop."

Please make it stop.

--

I could see the air becoming thick with a purple tinted miasma. Numbly I watched the swirls and just listened to Girtin breathing. It was kind of soothing. The little circles it made wrapping around us, inching closer and closer. It was wrong. All wrong. Girtin's steady breathing became more hurried, like he was running. All I did was clutch him tighter.

--

It felt different where I was. I could hear the wind billow around me, pushing my long red hair into my eyes. I could barely see where I was. I was kneeling and Girtin was gone. In his place was a note with a stone on it.

It was horrible. It was a farewell. I couldn't read past the first sentence before looking away, refusing to face what was on it. I put it down, replacing the rock upon it.

Where was Girtin? I look around frantically. If it meant what I thought it meant, and he said what I thought he said...then why am I here? Dully I realize that I am on top of a building; one of the taller ones in the town I grew up in. A storm was in the distance and the wind was starting to pick up. There was a purple balloon on the roof's ac unit. I don't know what drew me to it, but it reminded me of him. It was strange, seeing it here, how did it get here? 

"It's you." A voice says, breathlessly. I know it. Girtin. He looks like he did when we were younger: black hair and green eyes, not the sickly green it was before. Dark shadows hung under his teary red eyes. He smiled weakly at me. "You came back, Diedre. You look older. You look nice, a bit thin, but you are so tall."

"What am I doing here?" I painfully pleaded to him. He shrugged.

"What's done has already been done. Honestly, you could see, but I think you should stay put." He mournfully looked down street side, but quickly pulled away, looking back at me. "What now? I don't know, but I'm glad I could see you again, Diedre. I mean it, I really do.

"Why am I here?"

"I can't really answer that, but I think that I'm a spirit. Does that help, at all?" He tries to give his characteristic smirk at me, but that falls flat when he sees my frown deepen. "Ah, that was bad wasn't it? Diedre." His voice begins to plead with me. "You know what you're supposed to do. I'm a spirit. You're a reaper. No matter how much you hate it, how much it's going to hurt, you have to end me. I'd much rather you did it. I trust you."

No. I can't. I can't do that. No, don't make me do that. I can't believe that's the only way. If I'm going to end your suffering, I can't do that. I just got you back!

My hands grasp the scythe on the ground. I didn't remember it being there before; I think I would have noticed it, but it wouldn't have been the first time. I could maybe try something. My mind, grasping for straws, tries to remember what I was told before. That voice told me that I had options. What were they? Kill or save? What did that mean? Frustration and suffering bleeds into my thoughts, muddling them together. I can't. How could I?

Sever the regrets.

It was so simple.

"Girtin."

"Yes? Are you ready?"

"No, that's not what I'm going to do."

"Then what? I'm all ears." He looked like he was readying himself for a blow.

"What do you regret? Something you felt like you needed to do or say. Tell me."

Girtin pales at the mention of that. He doesn't meet my gaze. Come on Girtin, tell me. Do you want me to actually have to kill you? I can't do that. Just tell me. I don't care how bad it is. 

"I can't do that! You can't make me say that! It's so stupid. It's bad." Girtin's face begins to redden under my scrutiny.

"Come on! It can't be that bad!" My heart is thumping. I think we don't have a lot of time! "Just tell me!-"

"Diedre, I love you!!" Girtin says it like he was struck, holding his head in his hands, covering his burning face. "I always have, ever since I met you when we were kids, I just, I just didn't know how to say it. When you left, I was heartbroken, I-I especially after losing Betha and Silen." Oh, he was crying. Oh, I'm crying. I rush to pull him of the edge of the roof, crushing him in a bear hug and smothering him.

Even if I couldn't remember, I would be strong for you. I promised you in my heart that moment.

A warmth enveloped the air around us. I pull back from Girtin. He's wildly glancing around at the misama that is forming into a ball, leaving his heart. What is that? Is it his regret? Oh. It must be. Girtin was wiping the tears out of his eyes, trying to look at the orb. It was horrible, terrible to think how it weighed on him. I think that this is what I'm supposed to reap. Well there's only one way to find out. I grip the handle of the scythe again, but not before Girtin stops my hand.

"Uh, Diedre." He murmurs, shyly looking at me.

"Yes?" I smile softly.

"You don't owe it to me to respond to my feelings. Thank you for helping me and for listening." His smile means everything right now.

"Of course. We will get through this."

 

I motion for him to pull away. I hold the scythe out. A pleased hum enters the air. What was that? Was it the-? Oh. Just like that the orb is gone, sucked up into the blade. I didn't have to do anything at all. Warmth on the handle of "Felicity" causes me to look at the shape added to the metal. It sort of looks like a balloon. What? It was kind of anticlimactic, but considering the pleased hum it gets from Girtin, I decided to keep my mouth shut.

"Oh, a balloon. Hey, don't tell anyone this, but I really like them. Every time we went to the carnival, Betha, Silen, You, me and the adults, I'd always tag along to get them. You three were so excited to get them. I didn't get it. What's the point, I thought. Dang I was so stupid; they made you all happy. It took me a stupidly long time to get it. It's dumb. They just remind me of those days."

"It's not dumb, oh well maybe it is, at first glance, but once you told me I got it. It's so like you." I smile brightly in spite of how drained I felt. "Let's go back." Girtin nods, and lets me grasp his hand.

 -

I closed my eyes and when I opened them we were back. Not in the real world, like my heart so desperately wanted, but the other one. The one were he was dead and I wasn't. It was the one that I was going to have to be okay with, but I had long since accepted that.

I feel a warm hand on the back of my head, carefully leading my body down upon the ground. I feel so heavy, so tired. The watery version of Girtin in my eyes had an unreadable expression. I wonder lightly if he's used to it now: my fainting spells. My eyes close for another time and I feel the warmth of his arms. I let myself drift off, wondering where Silen was. I hope he's alright.

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I'm sorry.

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So...sorry that was so long. I know we just introduced Girtin last chapter, but plot happened.

I'd give you all hugs but I'm exhausted right now. Please take care of yourselves.

If you need to talk to someone about stuff and you need help there is a (US) hotline for that. I just felt like this would be necessary, considering I tried to keep it as non descriptive as possible.

https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/

  1-800-273-8255

 

 

---Chapter Navigation--

Chapter 8 (Linky) - Chapter 9  (you are here) --> Chapter 10 (Linky)

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{Forget Already} Lost [Main Fiction] (Chapter 8)

I almost didn't write this for awhile, but then when I started, I couldn't stop. Man, my fingers hurt! Lol. I hope you all enjoy the next chapter. I tried to make it a bit longer than the last one to make up for it!

Warnings: Light cursing (if that bothers you)

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 Silen's mom, after sobbing a little more in my arms, finally took me to her house. Or at least, where a house should be. It was an empty lot, white picket fence on all sides, surrounded by regular suburbia. I stood at the side walk dumbfounded. When I was little, I lived three blocks away, I've been to his house; it should be here in front of me, but it's not! Christine must have noticed that I wasn't following her.

"It's a little different now, but it's still home. It's still here, I promise."

"What do you mean by that?" I sputter out, before realizing how rude that sounded."How is it still here if I can't see it?" I try again.

"Ohhhh, that! It took me awhile to figure it out too, but it's simple!" she took my hand daintily, leading me across the strange lawn. Over time, step by step, the brazen dirt became a lawn that shimmered with morning dew. As we walked, it became apparent that we were going much further than I expected. In fact, what should have been a few feet, at max, became an open field with magenta soil splotched with what looked like regular grass. Even the sky was a muted blue, and the little clouds had a chalk-like look to them. If you asked me it was ugly. Though it's a moot point to even mention it out loud. Well, considering this world is not the real one. I have to remind myself this is real right now. Only right now.

After some time of walking, my feet begin to walk onto a cobble path. Looking up I noticed that it led to a small blue cottage. At this point, Silen's mom started to pick up the pace, practically sprinting down the path. It seemed that she knew we were almost there.

I was worried about Silen. I'm sure Miss Christine was worried about him too. He was always so skittish and cried a lot as a younger kid. I can't imagine him being alone in some other weird world like this one. That being said, I thought as I was ushered into the doorway, he lives here with his mom? I wish I had the brainpower to understand the how's and why's of this world, but I just can't, not right now. It would only serve to give me a headache at this point.

We weren't alone in the house. I don't think Christine even noticed at this point, but it didn't take her long. A person was sitting at the table, in darkness, but almost completely in view from the door. I didn't want to take my scythe out, so I called out to the person," Hey! Who's there?" I felt stupid for having such little words to say, but I didn't want to feel like an ass later.

"There's someone here?" Silen's mom confirmed, seemingly relaxed at the intrusion, almost like she was expecting someone, I couldn't tell "Come on, sweetie, don't sit in the dark, it'll hurt your eyes."

"Oh alright." The voice, coming from the kitchen table groaned " I was just trying to have a cool- never mind." the voice grumbled, sounding embarrassed. Then the light in the kitchen came on.

It was a boy my age. His bright hair and eyes were what drew me towards him almost immediately: they were both an unnatural forest green, as striking as the flush that quickly grew on his face. Oh. He was blushing. I don't know why he was doing that.

"Ah, I see that you might have to be reintroduced, well maybe." Christine brightly spoke, completely ignorant to the fact that there was an awkward moment happening right now. "Diedre, I'm sure you are having trouble remembering him, but that's ok! This boy, is-"

"Diedre?!?" He ran up to me, eyes starting to understand," You- why are you here? You...I couldn't find you, and everyone left me behind. After Betha and Silen just left...you- where did you go?? I looked everywhere!" Despair started to shake his features before he took a breath and composed himself. Miss Christine noticed his discomfort, finally, and gently took his hand from her position beside me.

"Girtin. It's okay now." She soothed, rubbing his hand before giving it a quick pat, "Diedre just had to go away for a while. Her mother took her to the city, but she's back now."

"You left a lot of shit behind, Diedre." The boy, now know to me as Girtin, swore. He stared straight into my eyes, trying to understand something in my expression. Did he know that I couldn't remember him?

"Girtin! I understand that you are going through somethings at home, but you should at least try to be nice to Diedre! She just got back!" Christine huffed, but looked like she understood.

It felt weird being talked about in front of you. Especially from people that you should know, but somehow don't. Girtin. I don't know why I can't remember you, but I'm sure you have a real good reason for what you're saying to me. Though it does kind of piss me off, being almost accused of being a terrible friend. But since I can't remember you, it makes sense. Are you even doing that though? Who am I really forgetting.

 Yes, I know I trust Miss Ona, but you I'm not sure. What were you even doing in her house? I decided to ask him, speaking for the first time in a while.

"How did you get in here anyway?" I ask, both of them looking at me simultaneously. Girtin looked amused, smirking at me.

"I have a key." He remarked smugly. "Ms.Ona trusts me." He pulls it out of his pocket, there are two other keys on it, and shakes it teasingly.

"Oh." I sigh, there goes my line of thought.

"Disappointed?" Girting smirks. Silen's mom smiles behind her hand.

"Kind of." I deadpan, suddenly bored of this. I could be finding Silen right now.

"Well kids, I think we've had enough time to reacquaint ourselves." Christine sighs lightly, almost fondly, looking at the children she loved as her own,"Girtin came to help me find Silen since...well you know." She sniffled.

"I'm a little confused." I pipe up,"Why did you act like you did when I saw you?"

"Ah, I was trying not to panic, I guess. It's just been so long since I've heard your voice sweetie." Ms. Ona sighs. "Girtin had already agreed, but I guess I had gotten all wound up again. Sorry, sweetie."

"I get it, sorry for bringing it up."

"Don't worry about it, sweetie." She smiles brightly," Two people looking for him is better than one!"

"Two- Girtin and me? You aren't coming?" I ask, feeling stupid again.

"Well, figured he'd wander back on his own. Ms. Ona wanted someone to stay here." Girtin provided, shrugging." We were about to swap when you got here." 

I nodded, it made sense. While Silen had the tendency to stay put when he was scared, he also was likely to wander around like a lost kid in a mall, till he made it to one of us.

Though, as I'm thinking about this, something is starting to bother me. I barely remembered Betha. I almost forgot Miss Ona. I remember bits and pieces about Silen, mostly including his scaredy cat nature. I don't remember Girtin at all. What the heck is wrong with my memory? I know it's been some time since I've seen all of them. I get that. But, these are people I used to think of as family! 

"Diedre....why do you have a scythe!?" Girtin sputtered, eyes widening in apparent fear.

"You have what?!?!" Ms. Ona squealed, grabbing Girtin's arm, almost causing him to fall over.

"I found it. I've been carrying it around because some weird voice told me to." I deadpanned, not letting my voice show off my confusion.

"A weird voice told you too?!" Girtin grimaced, grabbing my arms, beginning to shake me. "You know how fucking hard that is to believe?! Did it just drop out of the sky? OR did you find it in some weird shrine, begging you to take it?" His voice was starting to become a shout. He was starting shake, his eyes widening the longer he looked at it. "Ms. Ona it's the 'Felicity'. It's got to be!"

"Oh. My goodness, dear. What have you gotten yourself into?" Silen's mom shuddered into her hands, shaking her head. "How did you get a hold of that cursed blade?"

I looked to the people in front of me, one almost a complete stranger at this point, but both with the same expression on their faces: fear. Betha had the same expression when she realized. It made me rethink what I carried with me, but if I throw it away, what would happen? The voice from earlier acted like it was special. I hadn't seen anything thus far to confirm that, but everyone else keeps mentioning it so that's got to count for something. The more I learn about it, the more concerned I get. What if it fused to my hands. What if it made me hurt people? The fear I've been running from, denying all this time, finally caught up to me. What have I got myself into?

Oh. I'm on the floor now.

-

I look at you frowning. You did the right thing, pushing that other kid off him, but the teacher saw you. You got in trouble with her. Are you really ok? You know you can tell me what's wrong. You shrug my hand off you, mumbling that you are taking care of it. After waiting for your uncle, who never shows up, the adults at the office let you leave with me, my mother trailing behind wordlessly. She never asked what happened, she will later, but I think she understands. 

Silen was waiting with his mom, holding her hand, still teary eyed. I can hear her promising to wait for you, wanting to thank you again. We approach, my mother pulling Ms.Ona to the side, talking to her about what happened. Apparently, she didn't know much, but I didn't listen to them. You ask Silen if he's ok. You held Silen's hand as he cried, shrugging off his attempts to repay him, saying it was just his duty as his friend. That's was friends do for each other you say. I smile, grabbing Silen's other hand. I'm just glad he's alright. You promise that those kids wont hurt you again. I promise Silen the same, and assure him that Betha does too. We will protect you, Silen, I promise.

My mother tells us that it's time to go home, after all the school released you into her care. You need to go home. Silen sniffles one more time before being led away by his mother, walking hand in hand. I smile at the sight. You nod to me, then to my mother, who nods sagely back. This prompts a smile from me; you two never had much to say to each other. For so long, I thought you hated each other. But-XXXXXXXXX told me that some people are like that. That it was a "power play" or whatever that was. I sigh, holding mother's hand in one, and yours in the other, so you don't wander off.

It was nice. Mother led the way to your house, quietly responding to conversation, asking how you are doing in school and home. It was more than I'd heard her talk to you. You were talking so politely, it was like you were talking to a teacher. It was funny. I wish these times would last forever.

-----

Mother shakes me awake. We are going to town. She can't leave me here alone and she can't get Betha's family to watch me. What are we doing? Mother doesn't answer at first, thinking for a moment before responding, 'police station'. Why? What happened? Mother's blank expression folds into a sort of frown, I can't tell what she's really thinking.

He's lost, Mother says. Who? Who's lost? 

Silen. Silen's lost. They think they know, but we are going to help the police find him.

No. He's lost? No. He always finds his way home! He just...I had no answer. I felt myself go numb, grabbing my clothes, putting them on, brushing my teeth, combing my chin length hair. Mother stood at the door way, the taxi she called was waiting for us. A car. We are taking a car to town? Mother mumbles something about wanting to get there early, not wanting to waste a lot of time. Do you want Silen back, I asked her. He's a friend of yours, so I want to make sure he's ok. My heart sank. I want to cry already, fearing the worst.

I hope you are ok. Silen, please be ok. We'll put up posters! Go on tv! Whatever it takes, just so you come back to us.

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Long chapter is long, but I tried to have more dialogue since that's a weak point for me. ;.;

Haha. I hope you all enjoyed it all the same. :)

 

---Chapter Navigation--

Chapter 7 (Linky) - Chapter 8  (you are here) --> Chapter 9 (Linky)

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{Forget Already} Dead-in-the-Water city - Intro [Main Fiction] (Chapter 7)

 Wow a consistant update. Much wow. :)))))))))))))))))))

I am so tired right now.

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The weather looks better now, ever since I left Betha’s house. I still don’t see what she was talking about. Everything is normal, well, I guess as normal as stark metal trees can be. There’s a fresh breeze coming from behind me, spurring me on, but no miasma to be noticed. I can’t ignore the strange feeling that Betha gave me about that; her moods were also kind of unusual for her, but that could be just stress talking. After all, I have to tell myself, it had been six years since I had seen her alive. How many years had she been active? How long has she been alone here? 

All the stuff with this super hero stuff I have to do for that voice. If it were just for it, I’d try to walk away and screw the consequences. Then, it had to drag Betha into it, and who knows who else. How many people have been wrapped up in this mess? I really hope it isn’t that many. It hurts to think about all the people I might have forgotten about that could be dragged into this. Though that’s assuming a lot about what’s going on here. There’s still a little part of me that thinks that this is a dream or hallucination. 

All I can do now is walk. It might just be best to go along with the flow of this if it turns out that this is actually a dream. The sooner this reaches its natural conclusion, the sooner I can get back to normal. As I walk down the path of trees, the silver-gray of the trees gives way to a more natural tone of earthy brown. I never thought I would miss regular trees that much. I shouldn’t have to walk much farther now. Maybe. I should be looking for a welcome sign or a population marker. My feet start to hit solid asphalt. Huh, a road. She wasn’t but a couple of hours away. Well, that’s a good sign. I hope I get there soon, while I’m glad I have my tennis shoes, my feet are starting to hurt. 

The sun was lower in the sky by the time the wild forest thinned to purposely planted oaks and cedars surrounded by fences. To my right, a population sign. “Dead-in-the-water City. Population 2,500” What? That wasn’t what it was called when I lived here. It’s a new sign. Like, it’s brand new with the reflective paint still shining. Why did they change the name? What an edgy name.  

I look at the directions Betha gave me earlier. I just have to check a couple of spots that Silen could have wandered off to. It looks like I can check his house; the other places are regular quiet places for him, if he’s still that anxious kid he was. Even then, maybe there’d be more clues, should he not be where it would make a lot of sense for him to be. But who knows, maybe this will be easy. 

I don’t know what day it is, or even the time. I can’t really tell if it’s late morning or early afternoon. There’s not a good way to tell. Every car I see for blocks is parked, and it doesn’t look like they’ve been moved in a while. The tires are either low or completely flat. There’s nothing in the cars either, they don’t look broken in to. I feel like I’m walking in a ghost town.  

The problem is that I can feel eyes on me. I can’t resist the urge to flip around and face whatever has been following me. There’s just nothing here. Which means now is that I’m not only frustrated, since I’m kind of lost, but a bit creeped out. Even though somethings not behind me, I can’t shake that feeling. I have to get over it! I have to get to Silen’s house. It seemed like an easy enough goal at the start, but now, even with the directions that Betha gave me, I think I’m even more lost. Frustrated, I sit on the curb, setting my scythe down beside me. I can’t just give up now. What would Betha say if she were here? “Don’t give up, Diedre!” Huh, if only I wasn’t so cruddy with directions. I’m sure Betha would know exactly where it was. 

“Ah!” A small gasp came from my left. Tip tap. Tip tap. A walking cane guides a thin woman with gray-white hair in a low bun. Her whiteish hair made her look older than she was, but I’m thinking mid-thirties. Now that I think about it, she kind of looks like a librarian; if a librarian looked like a fifteen-year-old stuck in a scene phase. That was mean. Before I started apologizing for what I said in my head, she spoke again,” There’s someone new in town! Ah, I thought I was the only one in this neighborhood. What a relief!” She gazed uncertainly in my general direction. The nervous smile started to collapse into uncomfortable silence. She continued tapping towards me, “AH, but I’m being so rude right now, I’m terribly sorry! I haven’t introduced myself: my name is Christine Ona. It’s very hard for me to see you, so I apologize for being so strange. Haha!” Her nervous chattering, started to remind me of someone, someone I knew long ago. I wonder who? 

Silen. Silen Ona. Oh my god, this is his mom! I can’t believe I forgot her. Though at this point, I don’t think it’s much surprise considering I forgot Betha. But, Silen and her are so alike, I had forgotten. That same nervous demeanor and all that. I guess she forgot about me, but wait, she can’t see me very well. Right? Her eyesight was always super bad, but it’s gotten worse, hasn’t it? 

“Miss Ona. I don’t think you remember me, but it’s me: Diedre. Aaricia’s daughter. Diedre Waters. I used to live a couple of blocks away from you and Silen.” Ms.Ona jumped out of her skin, rushed at me, dropping her cane in the process. She held me in her arms. I jumped at the sudden contact, but stilled when I noticed her pale blue eyes misted over with tears. 

“Diiiiieeddree, darling! What on Heaven’s Earth are you doing here?” The dams in her eyes finally broke and I was left holding her up. Shame pooled in my stomach, remembering all the times I never thought to even contact her, especially after I left home. 

“It’s been six years, Ms.Ona. I’m sorry I never called you.” I mumbled, apologizing to the thin woman. She’s thinner than she used to be. Back when Mother let me visit a boy’s house, especially after Ms.Ona’s husband left her, she didn’t spend much money on food. Rather, she spent everything on her one and only son: Silen. That poor kid. Even when I was a kid myself, I was so glad to see that man go; he wasn't the nicest to Silen or his mother. I know it took a lot to divorce him. 

“Silen’s gone!” She wailed into my jacket. 

Gone!? How was he gone? Oh no.

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'Oh no' is right! WHere is that little guy???

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---Chapter Navigation--

Chapter 6 (Linky) - Chapter 7  (you are here) --> Chapter 8 (Linky)

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Find me on the web~030

tumblr: 

• forgottenheartache (official blog) 
•  for those that can't see it! -  https://www.tumblr.com/blog/forgottenheartache

•     whatami94 (personal-ish depression blog)
• for those that can't see it! - https://www.tumblr.com/blog/whatami94
  

email: what.ami_94@yahoo.com 
twitter: @scaredygiraffe (rant/depression and like blog)

• for those that can't see it! - https://twitter.com/scaredygiraffe 

Thank you all for the support!